Stay awake, don't die on me
by laylaorentea1985
Summary: Jane Banks is having trouble in school and with life. When she contemplates suicide, Mary Poppins shows up and talks her out of it. Rated for attempted suicide and death.


A/N: Bare with me, I am not a history major, so I do not know if they had medical planes back in the day to fly people back home. I am not 100 sure how accurate this story will be, but if you don't like, then tough! ;) I am a music major though. This was based on a nightmare I had a few weeks ago. People do get kicked out frequently and it can be publicized at the school because at our school, all the professors gossip. Love 'em though, but they all gossip. This is my outlet...love reviews...make me think my talent will not be wasted.

Jane Banks felt like she was worthless and useless all at the same time. She was very good at hiding it because her father never encouraged her and her brother Michael to show emotions.

When World War II came around, Jane was in school studying music to become a music teacher while Michael was fighting over in Germany and then in Austria. He was in Austria when his plane got gunned down and killed all the soldiers who were aboard, including him.

Jane and her parents were devastated after they received the news. Jane wanted to take the first boat home to be with her family, but they did not think that it would be safe for her to leave America with the war going on.

Meanwhile at Julliard's, her voice teacher started yelling at her during lessons because she could not get the notes right and her entrances down pat. Her violin teacher made it impossible for her to feel comfortable around the violin without its strings snapping and nearly hitting her in the eye. To top it off, her piano teacher made it sound like she was going to get kicked out of the music program.

That night in her dormitory, Jane decided to make a noose. She stood on her desk and she threw the noose over the beam and tied it tightly. When she turned around, she saw her old nanny, Mary Poppins. Mary Poppins looked exactly like she did nearly ten years ago.

"Really Jane!" scolded Mary Poppins. "You know that this is childish and stupid!"

"Mary Poppins!" gasped Jane as she took the noose off from around her neck.

"Jane, what on earth possessed you to think of suicide?" asked Mary Poppins as she helped Jane down from her desk.

"Oh Mary Poppins, my life is falling apart!" cried Jane. "Michael…he died, Mary Poppins! He died!"

Mary Poppins nodded. "I know. I was there with him. I was his nurse. Before that plane was shot down, I helped him with that bullet nick he got in his chest. That was not a fighter plane he was on. It was a medical plane, trying to get the patients back to England so they could be safer."

Jane cried even harder. She could not believe the Nazi's were that heartless to shoot down a medical plane, which was full of sick and dying soldiers.

"I was with him briefly before he died, Jane," smiled Mary Poppins. "He told me he wanted you to be happy. He said to tell you to find a good man to take care of you and make you happy."

This made Jane cry even more hard. Mary Poppins gave Jane a great big hug and told her that everything will be all right.

"No it won't Mary Poppins," sniffed Jane. "My piano teacher told me that she was going to make it to where I was going to get kicked out of Julliard's!" "Does she know what happened to you brother?" asked Mary Poppins.

Jane had to think for a moment. "You didn't tell them?" said Mary Poppins.

Jane nodded.

"Why?"

"Because father does not believe in letting our troubles surface," cried Jane.

"Surely your father could understand you were upset because you could not be home for your brother's funeral and you miss him," said Mary Poppins.

"I can't tell them!" Jane protested.

"Jane, if you do, then I am sure they will understand," reassured Mary Poppins.

Jane wiped her eyes and then looked at Mary Poppins.

"Where did they bury him?" asked Jane.

"In the family plot in St. Paul's cemetery," said Mary Poppins. "Now it is late and it is time for you to get some sleep."

Mary Poppins had Jane go change into her nightgown as she drew the covers on the bed back for her. Jane came back in the room in her nightgown and Mary Poppins led her to the bed. She had Jane lie down and covered her up.

"Jane, I am going to sit by your bedside until you fall asleep," said Mary Poppins as she held her hand. "I do not want an argument." Jane nodded and sobbed a little tear.

"Tomorrow, you are going to show your professors that letter your mother sent to you, which said that your brother died so they will know the reasons behind your misery," said Mary Poppins. "Remember, suicide is not the way out."

Jane eventually fell asleep. She dreamed about her and her brother when they were children and when Mary Poppins took them on outings with Burt, that friendly eccentric fellow who did odd jobs for a living.

When Jane awoke the next morning, May Poppins had already left. Jane did not know whether or not she was dreaming about Mary Poppins talking to her about her troubles.

Jane got dressed for class and she came across the letter her mother wrote to her a few weeks ago stating that Michael died.

She went to her piano lessons and when she got there, the first thing she did was give Miss Pettitt the note. Miss Pettitt read the note and then she looked at Jane.

"Oh Miss Banks," said Miss Pettitt. "If I only knew that you were in this much pain maybe I would not have been so harsh. I wish you would have told me earlier."

"I didn't know how to," said Jane as a fresh tear fell against her face.

Miss Pettitt told Dr. Burns, who in turn told the Dean and the Dean decided that since Miss Banks was generally a good student, she should be excused from school work for the next two weeks to catch up with the others.

Three years later, Jane Banks graduated from top of her class at Julliard's and got a job immediately at a local school in New York City. Her parents were there and were very proud of her indeed.

Just as Michael wished before he was killed, Jane married a good man named Freddy. He was kind to her and took very good care of her and her children until the day Freddy died of tuberculosis.

Jane was a very young widow when Freddy died and was left with two small children; Rose and Manny.

Jane thought about suicide again, but snapped out of it when she thought about that night Mary Poppins visited her at Julliard's.

_Suicide is not the answer…_

Jane went back to work at the grade school to support herself and her two children, even though her parents begged her to come back to England.

Many more years passed by when Jane would be visited again by Mary Poppins. At this time, Rose and Manny were grown up and married with families of their own. Jane was very elderly and nearing death due to cancer.

_For a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down, the medicine go down…_

Mary Poppins visited her in the hospital and sang to her as she lied in her bed dying with a smile on her face.

_Feed the birds, topence a bag, topence, topence, topence a bag. Feed the birds, that's what she cries. While over head, her birds fill the sky…_

Through losing her brother and her husband, Jane Banks-Wildly had a very good life.


End file.
